angels?? maybe...

there's one story i want to share about the loss of anna that i didn't share before.  after i had gone out of the sanctuary and was sitting outside, apparently the session had been released.  one of my girls went to search for her mom in an effort to use mom's leverage with our airline to get me on a flight back home as soon as possible (thank you for whoever paid for my change fee).  amidst all of these people, she was able to find her mom almost immediately (which hadn't happened all weekend, despite their efforts).  she was crying, explaining to her mom what had happened.  a woman was apparently observing them and walked up and said she felt the Spirit telling her to ask if she could pray for them.  my girlfriend explained what had happened to the gal, then girlfriend and mom couldn't believe their ears.  the woman had been through almost the exact same thing.   two weeks before she was preparing to travel to pick their twins up, she lost one.  she wanted to talk to me.

they brought her over to me, and i could be imagining it, but i'm pretty sure she was glowing.  they explained what had happened, and i just hugged this poor woman so tight i think i almost choked her.  we cried together and shared some sweat and a few words.  it was the biggest gift God could have given to me.  i knew then and there that this was of a greater plan, for His glory, which gave me peace that surpassed understanding.  there is no way out of 2,000+ people that this woman "coincidentally" walked up to my girlfriend.  i am no mathematician, but the odds of a woman having gone through the same thing, being there at that conference, being on that patio at that time and being willing to walk up to two upset woman are pretty slim.  just think of the odds of adoptive twins alone...really? 

this is one of the things that i still hold on to through the challenges of grieving the loss of a daughter that was bound to my heart, who's face i've seen in pictures but never got to touch.  it's such a unique and odd loss.  the feelings are unexplainable.  the past few months have been challenging, painful and growth inducing.  i have questioned God in a way that i have never before, and i have trusted Him and seen Him in a way i never have before.  my absence of posts has been about a time of removing distractions and focusing on Him.  He has showed up in my life in a way that i never knew he could (he keeps doing that)!  just when i think i've seen the best of Him and been the closest to him, he ups the ante.  one thing i know, i want more of Him, and am surrendered in a whole new way (again)! 

angels??  i'm not sure the bible would support that notion, but i do know it was fellow servant who was obedient to the Spirit's leading. 

here's her organizations website, this proves she's real...right?! ;)